I’ve just had an epiphany.
For yeeeeeeears I’ve been listening to Radio BEATMYSELF UP FM whilst idly accepting that this is what’s playing in the background…
And it had to get so f***ing loud that I could no longer ignore it. Nor the damage it is doing. Quietly…. or not so quietly right now.
And I sit here, and listen. And wallow. And cry. And tell myself I don’t know what to do with all that chatter. All those beliefs. All those so-called truths, that are really just self-sabotage.
Yet, what do I do when the actual radio station plays stuff I don’t like? Like when it goes all – now outing myself with my age – “young people plinky plonk” after 7pm on the weekends? Or when it’s constant football match chatter?
I don’t even think twice. I do one of those things:
– switch stations
– put on my “Feel Good Songs” playlist
– put on an audiobook 0r
– turn the damn thing off altogether, so I can hear myself think.
No brainer.
Completely automatic. Don’t like to listen to this – it’s off. Easy.
Yet, here I am, listening to the chatter in my head, playing BEATMYSELF UP FM on full volume again and I’ll just accept it.
WHY?
I guess I just thought that I couldn’t turn it off. Because I couldn’t find a switch. Because there IS no physical switch. But what if the act of simply CHOOSING is the switch?!…
Yup. It’s actually THAT easy. (Okay, not that easy, but you know what I mean. And practice makes perfect, right?!…)
So, from now on, when BEATMYSELF UP FM comes on, I will consciously remind myself to do one of the following:
– switch stations
– put on BREATHE FM
– play an audiobook or
– reflect, and maybe sit down and write.
And the more I’ll do this consciously, the easier it will become.
Until I don’t have to think about this any more at all.
With love,
Elke
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Published on Aug 8, 2026